Funniest dating site messages

(“Lil’ Sebastian” — Ron confronts Leslie about an office affair) Ron: How long have you been sleeping with Ben? It’s none of your- you have- the nerve, the audacity, Ben is my boss, technically. And how- how- do I know, frankly, that you’re not sleeping with him? I don’t even get– why would– I’ve never had sex with anyone, anywhere. Tom: Listening to that tree-lighting’s gonna be dope. (“Indianapolis” — Ron is hungry) Ron: This isn’t a steak. I worry that what you just heard was, “Give me a lot of bacon and eggs.” What I said was, “Give me all the bacon and eggs you have.” Do you understand? Ron: Just give me all the bacon and eggs you have […] Wait, wait.But the downside is it's really hard to tell for sure if someone you're texting is really into you or just stringing you along.Here are some red flags that your text crush probably isn't that into you and it might be time to delete their number. (“Media Blitz” — Andy tells a cop what he’s doing in a van) Andy: I technically shouldn’t be even driving, because my license is crazy expired. (“Woman of the Year” — A prestigious women’s award goes to Ron instead of Leslie) Leslie: That’s not really the attitude I’d expect from an award-winner Ron: Everything I do is the attitude of an award winner, because I’ve won an award. (“The Master Plan” — Leslie gets drunk) Leslie: You know what’s thirsty? (“The Fight” — Tom invites his colleagues to a business meeting) Tom: If you don’t make it, then you’re on my Dunzo List.

What It Means: At first it's flattering when the person you're talking to asks you ~sexy questions~ or implies that they're into you You've been texting your crush and they've made it seem like they're down to hang out, but when you try to nail down an actual time and place, they leave you on read.

(“The Flue” — Leslie gets sick before she has to make a big speech) Leslie: No, I can’t- I can’t go home.

(“Christmas Scandal” — Leslie has an announcement) Leslie: And I am proud to announce for the first time ever this year, our tree-lighting ceremony will be simulcast on Internet radio. "We Take, Among Other Things, Umbrage" Aught Lang Syne Comedy Culture Economics Education Film Food Getting Lost Law Literature MLB Preview Bonanza Monday Medley Music NPI Comes Alive!

It can be fun, terrible, exciting, hard — the adjectives used to describe it are endless.

But this guide was created to help you navigate your way through all those adjectives and shed the only light you’ll ever need on an otherwise confusing, strenuous experience.

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